Not So Golden Globes

I know what you’re thinking. Wait… a non-sports post? On this site? In the middle of the playoffs? Well...yeah.   Because I also dig movies.   Other than sports, lawyering and generally basking in the loveliness of the Better Half, the rest of my time is probably spent enjoying a good flick or watching quality tv shows.  As I’ve also previously shown, I like to make it interesting by throwing out my picks. Everything (games, award shows, etc) is more fun to watch when you have a vested interest in the winner. So as award season kicks off, I thought I’d venture a guess at the Golden Globes, which I believe airs tonight.  I’ve never picked these particular awards before but I am a reigning Oscar picks champion (should be two-time champion. Thank you very much Sean Penn over Mickey Rourke) so this shouldn’t be that much different.

However, I am going to hedge a bit.  The Golden Globes, as I understand them, pander to big Hollywood stars and can basically be bought through swag to the voters from the studios.  I mean, look at some of the nominees.  The Tourist? First, no one saw that. Second, anyone who did see it thought it was garbage. Third, it is not a musical and any comedy was strictly unintentional.  But hey Johnny D and Brangelina are fun to have at a party so nominate them.  So to battle the absurdity, I am going to do the classic “Who Will Win” and “Who Should Win.”  Also I’ve thrown in some of the TV ones as well even though I have not really watched most of the shows before because, hey, why not.

BEST MOTION PICTURE, DRAMA

"Black Swan"
"The Fighter"
"Inception"
"The King's Speech"
"The Social Network"

I’ve seen: 4/5

Should Win: True Grit.  That’s right. Curveball. The fact that True Grit wasn’t even nominated shows how cheap these awards are.  But, fact,  Euros hate westerns  (Unforgiven didn’t win Best Picture either).   Which is a shame because True Grit is really good. More about this in my top ten wrap-up that will get finished after I see Black Swan, 127 hours and a couple others. Of the nominated flicks, I would say Social Network.

Will Win: The King’s Speech.  Saw  this on Saturday. Pretty good.  A movie that my grandmother would really like. But, above all else,  it is a Euro-centric movie with a bunch of solid English actors.  The voters are the Hollywood Foreign Press.  They like to give spread the love around to non-Hollywood movies.  Examples – (Atonement over No Country for Old Men, Sense and Sensibility over Braveheart, Babel over the Departed).  The voters will look out for their own and hit the non-existent dislike button on Social Network. (What’s better than a million awards for your movie…)

BEST MOTION PICTURE, MUSICAL OR COMEDY

"Alice in Wonderland"
"Burlesque"
"The Kids Are All Right"
"Red"
"The Tourist"

I’ve Seen: 1/5

Should Win: Toy Story 3. The Kids Are All Right is the only movie on this list that should be nominated for anything other than Worst Movie of the Year.  I’ve only seen Alice in Wonderland and it was crap.  And they wonder why people think their awards show is a joke.  The fact that TS 3 wasn’t nominated it pretty nuts considering (a)  it had about 99% on rotten tomatoes and (b) Toy Story 2 (not as good as TS3) won this category in 1999 so they can’t exactly say they don’t enjoy animation.  It is particularly shocking because the quality of movies in this category is somewhere between putrid and slightly below average.  Let me throw some stats. The Metacritic numbers for the movies in this category were: Kids (86); Burlesque (48); Alice (53); Red (61); Tourist (37).  Toy Story? 92.  The 3^rd highest ranking of 2010. Consider the ball dropped.

Will Win: Kids are All Right.  With this and Black Swan, lesbians are so hot right now.

BEST DIRECTOR

Darren Aronofsky, "Black Swan"
David Fincher, "The Social Network"
Tom Hooper, "The King's Speech"
Christopher Nolan, "Inception"
David O. Russell, "The Fighter"

I’ve seen – 3/5

Should Win: Fincher.

Will Win: Fincher.  Inception was probably more technically challenging but Social Network was just really well done.  I didn’t learn until like a month later that the Winkelvii was actually just one dude.  Crazy.

BEST DRAMATIC ACTOR

Jesse Eisenberg, "The Social Network"
Colin Firth, "The King's Speech"
James Franco, "127 Hours"
Ryan Gosling, "Blue Valentine"
Mark Wahlberg, "The Fighter"

I’ve seen: 3/5

Should Win: Firth.  The only real competition should come from Franco. But I haven’t seen that one yet.  

Will Win: Firth.  England’s favorite repressed nerd finally wins a big one.  The speech will be classy and self-deprecating.  Girls who loved BBC version of Pride and Prejudice will remark how much older he looks.

BEST DRAMATIC ACTRESS

Halle Berry, "Frankie and Alice"
Nicole Kidman, "Rabbit Hole"
Jennifer Lawrence, "Winter's Bone"
Natalie Portman, "Black Swan"
Michelle Williams, "Blue Valentine"

I’ve seen: 1/5

Should win: Portman. If anything to rectify her snub for Star Wars II: Attack of the Clones.  The girl from True Grit should have been in here too. Not saying she wins. But she’s in the discussion.

Will Win: Portman.  I liked Winter’s Bone but Jennifer Lawrence’s performance was pretty subtle. And subtly doesn’t usually bring home the trophies.  (As others, including the Better Half, know all too well, I will gladly argue that Clooney’s role in Up in the Air was more challenging and, subsequently, more deserving of an Oscar than Bridges in Crazy Heart.  I will speak passionately. You will yawn.)

BEST ACTOR, COMEDY OR MUSICAL

Johnny Depp, "Alice in Wonderland"
Johnny Depp, "The Tourist"
Paul Giamatti, "Barney's Version"
Jake Gyllenhaal, "Love and Other Drugs"
Kevin Spacey, "Casino Jack"

I’ve seen: 1/5

Should Win: Another joke category that generally speaks to how bad 2010 was for movies, especially comedies.   I am not sure any of these movies are comedies, which is understandable because I can’t even think of a good comedy that came out this year.  Very sad.  The closest thing I could think of for this category was Michael Cera in Scott Pilgrim v. the World.  I really like this one and it is kind of a musical and kind of a comedy.  Definitely better than any of these garbage picks.

Will Win:  I don’t know. Spacey?

BEST ACTRESS, COMEDY OR MUSICAL

Annette Bening, "The Kids Are All Right"
Anne Hathaway, "Love and Other Drugs"
Angelina Jolie, "The Tourist"
Julianne Moore, "The Kids Are All Right"
Emma Stone, "Easy A"

I’ve seen: 0/5

Should Win: Hathaway. Gratuitous nudity from A-List start should be handsomely rewarded.

Will Win: Benning. Setting up yet another Oscar showdown. Lucky for her, no Hilary Swank this year.

SUPPORTING ACTOR

Christian Bale, "The Fighter"
Michael Douglas, "Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps"
Andrew Garfield, "The Social Network"
Jeremy Renner, "The Town"
Geoffrey Rush, "The King's Speech"

I’ve seen: 3/5

Should Win: John Hawkes, Winter’s Bone.  Awesome, subtle performance by a character usually seen in bit parts.  Previously only known to me as Kenny Powers brother and an inconsequential temple dweller on Lost, Hawkes stole Winter’s Bone for me with his rough, yet honorable nuanced performance. 

Will Win: Bale.  I saw the Fighter and enjoyed it.  Is it Bale’s best work? No. Was his performance a little too look at me I’m acting! for me?  Yep.  Could they have toned down the Mass-hole/Pahk ya cah at Hahvad yahd-iness for me?  Yeah a bit. (Who’s fightin’? Nawht you. Nawht you)  But Bale is one of the best actors out there right now and his physical transformation in this movie was pretty intense. Dude looked like a crackhead.  Thus he squeaks in over Rush, who will get more votes here than at the Oscars. 

SUPPORTING ACTRESS

Amy Adams, "The Fighter"
Helena Bonham Carter, "The King's Speech"
Mila Kunis, "Black Swan"
Melissa Leo, "The Fighter"
Jacki Weaver, "Animal Kingdom"

I’ve seen: 1/5

Should Win: Adams.  Truth be told, I thought Amy Adams was the best part of the Fighter.  Played a different type of role than she usually plays and played it well.

Will Win: Amy Adams. I thought this would be where they usually throw out a wild card and occasionally pick an international star that no one has ever heard of.  (i.e. Weaver).  Well, upon review, I was wrong.  Most of the past winners are pretty well-known actresses in studio movies. Thus I bet Adams and Leo split the Fighter vote and Carter takes it on the rebound. But then I saw King’s Speech and saw that Carter doesn’t really do very much.  So I am back to square 1.  Thus I stick with Adams, who was really good.  Remember the vote  doesn’t have to be unanimous.  You could technically win with 20% of the vote. Thus another reason why too much hype is placed on these things.

ANIMATED FILM

"Despicable Me"
"How to Train Your Dragon"
"The Illusionist"
"Tangled"
"Toy Story 3"

Will/Should Win: Toy Story.  Stone Cold Lock. 


TELEVISION CATEGORIES

DRAMATIC TV SERIES

"Boardwalk Empire"
"Dexter"
"The Good Wife"
"Mad Men"
"The Walking Dead"

Should Win: Mad Men.  Really good season this year. I’ve never seen Dexter so it could be really good I guess but Walking Dead was only ok for me and I checked out of Boardwalk Empire after 2.5 episodes.  The fact that Lost wasn’t in this category is also a joke.  Say what you will about Lost but the last season has some very good episode.  And it was the biggest thing on tv last year.  Some it some respect.

Will Win: Mad Men.

BEST ACTOR, TV DRAMA

Steve Buscemi, "Boardwalk Empire"
Bryan Cranston, "Breaking Bad"
Michael C. Hall, "Dexter"
Jon Hamm, "Mad Men"
Hugh Laurie, "House"

Should Win:  Hamm.  Hamm brought it this year finally hitting rock bottom in possibly the best episode on tv this year.

Will Win: Hamm

 

BEST ACTRESS, TV DRAMA

Julianna Marguiles, "The Good Wife"
Elisabeth Moss, "Mad Men"
Piper Perabo, "Covert Affairs"
Katy Sagal, "Sons of Anarchy"
Kyra Sedgwick, "The Closer"

Should Win:  Moss.  Peggy Olson really held this season together with consistently strong performances.  Her performance in “The Suitcase” alone should win this award. 

Will Win: Marguiles.  The way Mad Men has on so many good characters is kind of a disadvantage to all the actors come awards season that are not Don Draper.  Even though they kill it every scene, they aren’t really in many scenes each episode. Thus I think Peggy gets the shaft.  If this was last season, I would be all in on Sagal. Season 2 of Sons of Anarchy was awesome but the third season was a little slower and I actually haven’t finished watching it.  Therefore I’m going with Marguiles because my mom likes that show.  

TV SERIES, MUSICAL OR COMEDY

"30 Rock"
"Big Bang Theory"
"The Big C"
"Glee"
"Modern Family"
"Nurse Jackie"

Should Win: Parks  & Recreation.  Funniest show on tv. There are others in the discussion but this show is it.  Please starting watching it on Thursdays.

Will win: Modern Family.  Phil is one of my favorite characters on the box. And even though this season has been good, last season of 30 Rock was awful.

BEST ACTOR, TV MUSICAL OR COMEDY

Alec Baldwin, "30 Rock"
Steve Carell, "The Office"
Thomas Jane, "Hung"
Matthew Morrison, "Glee"
Jim Parsons, "The Big Bang Theory"

Should win: Thomas Jane, Hung.    Haha. Just kidding that show is awful and painfully unfunny.  For this category, I’m picking Charlie Day from Always Sunny.  He’s the best.

Will win: Carell. He’s about to leave The Office and he should be rewarded.  Further I think Chuck Lorre-produced schlock like Big Bang Theory and Two and a Half Men is awful and shouldn’t win anything except cancellation.  Sorry if that’s your thing.

BEST ACTRESS, TV MUSICAL OR COMEDY

Toni Collette, "The United States of Tara"
Edie Falco, "Nurse Jackie"
Tina Fey, "30 Rock"
Laura Linney, "The Big C"
Lea Michele, "Glee"

Should Win: Amy Poehler. Parks and Rec.  What started out as a straight copy of Michael Scott has quickly evolved into her own hilarious character.  If you think there is a Parks & Rec trend here, there is.  It’s the best.

Will Win: Tina Fey.  She wins a lot.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A SERIES, MINISERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION

Hope Davis, "The Special Relationship"
Jane Lynch, "Glee"
Kelly Macdonald, "Boardwalk Empire"
Julia Stiles, "Dexter"
Sofia Vergara, "Modern Family"

Should Win: Kaitlin Olson, Always Sunny. Always funny.

Will Win: Jane Lynch.  I only started watching Glee this year with the Better Half and I think the criticism that her character is one-note are pretty on the mark. But she is still pretty funny.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A SERIES, MINISERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION

Scott Caan, "Hawaii Five-O"
Chris Colfer, "Glee"
Chris Noth, "The Good Wife"
Eric Stonestreet, "Modern Family"
David Strathairn, "Temple Grandin"

Should Win: TIE! Chris Pratt and Nick Offerman, Parks and Rec.  I thought Ron Swanson would win this in a walk but upon my second viewing of Parks and Rec, I really saw how great Andy Dwyer is in the second half of the season.  Over the course of a season, Andy goes from being a dumb, superfluous character to a dumb, indispensable character.  I can’t choose between the two. It’s a tie.

Will Win: Stonestreet.  Fizbo episode was hilarious.